teacher?more like "teach?....er?"

That's exactly how I felt when suddenly my teacher from my old school asked me to be a substitute teacher while I was having my holiday after Asasi. Being a teacher is like the last thing on my mind, like if being a teacher is the last job that is available in this world, I won't even choose it. I've been vocalling my disinterest with teaching since after my SPM because some people also asked back then if maybe I want to become a teacher for awhile.

It's not that I'm belittling the career, heck, for me being a teacher is like the most honorable job in this world because if not for them, what are we all going to be this day right? It's just I have this little anxiety in facing with new people, not to mention many people, which in this case the students and top of that I need to teach them until they understand? Woah, that's gonna take a toll on me.

To say the first day was nerve wracking is an understatement. I could barely sleep the night before and even after I got some sleep, I woke up like 4 in the morning because I keep on thinking what am I suppose to do on the first day; should I just do introduction or should I conduct a game or should I just start teaching? And how are the students going to take me as their new teacher? Are they going to feel happy or bored? Things were so jumbled up in mind at that time I don't even realize I already arrived at school?

Well let just say the day went well and I manage to overcome my nerve when bunch of eyes set on me. It always makes me uncomfortable but I think this can be taken as a practice for me to lessen down my anxiety. There are so many things that I learned after teaching for two months. One thing is that for those who said that being a teacher is easy, like you just went to the class and teach and then mark the students' books; you are so wrong. Being a teacher means that you have to think beforehand on what you want to teach the students, how are you going to teach them in order to make the session not boring and lively and the students participating in the session. You have to also prepare some sort of scenario in your head of what would be the situation in class if you do this or that in order to prepare for mind of whatever consequences. And the questions from the students, you somehow have to think of an answer, no matter how silly the question sounded because who knows, behind those silly question is a future leader?

Writing the "Pelan Mengajar Mingguan" is another thing because sometimes you have planned something for the class tomorrow but end up you had an impromptu idea during the class so you end up doing something else. Then you have to rewrite the report and push the original ideas to another session. I think another obstacle I had while teaching was because of the PBS system. The system is new and since I'm a substitute teacher, this confuses me a lot because of the complication of it (it's not really complicated, it just so sudden for me who had just entered the school to suddenly being introduced to all the things I need to do for PBS). I think PBS is a good system to replace the PMR and SPM; what with the Band system where the students' knowledge get analyze after every topic, but I think it still need to be revise and come out with a better ways to implement it because the way I see it, teachers are being distracted to focus more on how to make sure all the students got to Band 6 rather than teach them the knowledge.

I sound so boring aren't I? Well whatever haha

Oh, now I know why most teachers tend to remember the naughty or the loud students more than the diligent or the smart one. Because it truly happened to me too. They are the one that I remembered first because of the way they cheer up the class and all the absurd questions they asked me XD. And now I'm kinda miss them sob sob.

students having exam

I also got to celebrate the teachers' day for the first time as a teacher. It's funny because how before this, I just like when the teacher playing game but now I'm the one who participate in it. And that day was also the day one of the school's most dedicated teacher retired, Mllmh Norlida.She taught me Science during Form 3.

pengetua main game tu

last day for mllmh norlida

It's confusing somehow in the teachers' room when sometimes I have to call my teachers as "Muallimah" and the new one that wasn't there when I went to this school as "Kakak". My tongue kept on "tersasul" because of this hahaha. I thanked Kak Aisyah and Izzatul a lot because if not for them, I don't think I will manage to bear for two months in teaching, considering how I was so reluctant to teach. We are like "belangkas" there lol because of how the three of us came from this school and how we are in the same range of age compared to the other teachers. Thanks for the good memory, Kak Aisyah we still owe the date to Sushi King XD.

trio :3

last day kak aisyah.thanks for everything~